Delegate, Dammit!

Small Biz Book – Post #1

I’ve mentioned one of my favorite books by Jen Sincero, You are a Badass, at least a few times. Just reading something with a curse word in the title makes you a badass-am I right? (Hence, the title of this post. You’re welcome.) Today I am going to focus on delegation. Jen wrote, “You absolutely cannot grow a business, get promoted or be a cool parent, and you absolutely will go gray before your time, if you try to do every single little thing by yourself.” Unless you are a hair colorist seeking clients, you might find that statement unsettling. I know I did because I suck at delegating.

While in charge of a classroom, I found it hard to delegate tasks to parents, teacher assistants and students. I always felt it would take me more time to explain how to complete a job than it would to just do it myself. And, I knew if I did it, it would get done correctly the first time. Furthermore, there’s a part of me that doesn’t want to come across as bossy, at least to other grown folks. However, this inability to allow willing helpers to complete small items on my checklist caused me to be less successful than I could have been. Ultimately, 15 years of juggling every single plate thrown my way made me overwhelmed and burned out- to the point of calling it quits. I walked away from a job that I had invested 6 years of higher education, and I’m not even going to say how much money, into.

And, guess what? Since you take yourself with you wherever you go, this micromanagement followed me out of the school building. For example, when my children “helped” with the dishes, and later I found cups and bowls right-side up in the dishwasher, full of nasty water, I cursed myself for not having cleaned them myself. As for when I’m outside of the classroom and the house … um, still guilty of control-freak behavior. When handling payroll for our family’s small business, I trusted no one else to receive timesheets by text and add up the hours (a.k.a. simple technology & math skills). This led to me completing payroll while throwing up from a margarita hangover in the back of a Suburban on a relentless two-hour ride home. Even worse, I also calculated and entered payroll when I was on vacation with my family in Hawaii. Let me repeat: I missed out on some freggin’ Hawaii time with the fam simply due to a lack of willingness to relinquish control.

The apple certainly didn’t fall far from the tree in my case; I learned this trait by example. I grew up watching my father, an electrician, run a one-man business. He not only didn’t want a boss to answer to but he also didn’t trust anyone else to handle any facet of his company. Dad’s decision resulted in, from what I can remember on more nights than not, him resembling Kevin Arnold’s disgruntled father on the 90s sitcom, The Wonder Years. No help resulted in dad allowing himself to break away from work exactly one week out of the allotted 52 a year. As a family, we traveled in a Ford Bronco for a meager camping trip. If we were lucky, one amusement park day was thrown in.

While I agree with my father’s belief that working to make someone else rich on their time-clock doesn’t resonate well with the freedom that my soul desires, I’m also eyes wide open to his mistake. Whether it’s in a business or a home, no delegation = no growth or progression. And while growth may not be your goal, it’s safe to say that remaining sane (a side-effect of not doing everything by yourself) is a sought-after achievement.

Delegating comes at two costs: letting go of perfection and time spent on the front end. Perfection oftentimes comes at the cost of exhaustion or grumpiness. For example, I could leave my stacked dishes as they are and feel frustrated or clean them myself and feel exhausted. Allowing someone else to wash them would almost certainly result in me having to wash a few dishes before beginning to cook the next meal. When weighing those three options, perfection loses out. As for the time spent on training, it pays back in dividends on the back end. I could reap heavenly benefits if I would take 10 minutes to gather and show the crew how to load the dishwasher correctly.

I’ve also been on the opposite end of a control freak and it feels like a slap in the face to know your capabilities but to not be trusted to put them into action. I believe it’s innate in human nature to feel proud when we accomplish anything, especially when it benefits others. In the instances that I have trusted another to complete a task for me, I felt kind; their satisfaction in their own growth and ability to help me warmed my heart. Have others made mistakes when helping me? Most certainly! Did I mess up when I first began? Of course! Delegating comes down to being able to chill out for a small period of time to earn rewards that will last for a much longer period of time.

***

In summary, Small Biz What Not to Do #1:

Don’t be so controlling that you refuse to relinquish some of your responsibilities to others, losing your mind and cool status in the process.

Being able to let go is a work-in-progress with me. For some reason, I have found it easier to hand over responsibilities to a plan moreso than to a person. Education guru, Harry Wong, has said to put a procedure in place for anything that drives you crazy (any situation, not any person). In the 2nd Small Biz Book post, I will explore establishing procedures in the workplace.