Aw, man to this topic. I really hated to let this practice go. I am sincerely writing this post to help get me through the withdrawal period, the same as I did when I gave up liquor for 2 months last fall, alcohol for a week during quarantine and a month off of libations just to prove I could back in 2019. It could be said that maybe I just like a challenge, but still yet, all support is appreciated.
I used to get manicures. To justify the cost, I told myself since I was teaching first graders how to read, pointing to letters and words constantly, my nails should be interesting and pretty. Honestly, pretty nails just made me feel pretty. (A dig into why I felt this way is probably a deep, slippery slope that I’d rather not examine at the moment.) At some point, I ran out of disposable income and the patience for the time commitment of keeping those nails up. The picture above is my daughter’s nails, the picture below is my hand after a normal day of work. Along my trail of 47 years, I’m happy to say that I finally earned at least a little common sense.
I honestly always thought my eyelashes were fine. I despised applying mascara, because I would inevitably blink and then…time. However, I was just off of a break-up when my friend handed me coupons for discounted lash applications at a nearby salon. The first ones were my “gateway” lashes, so to speak. They were rather inexpensive (under $20) but I found the quality of the work was directly affected by who put them on. They also used goopy glue and got droopy after a week of wearing. This prompted me to try the more expensive lash extensions (approximately $100 for a new set and $50 for a fill in about once a month.) From the first appointment, I was hooked.
I received many compliments over the years and I liked how I looked in the mirror (not in pictures so much but that’s another story). And, o-m-gee the time saved on make up was amaze-balls. Early on in my addiction, I remember a lady at a retirement party telling me a story about getting an infection from lash extensions. I had never had a problem, so I did not heed her warning. I also did not heed the warning from my contact lenses. I figured I still had one eye with good sight.
Now, I would like to pause here for a moment to discuss the internal conflict that I’ve had going on about appearance enhancements for years. I’ve had my hair permed, high-lighted or colored since high school. I even once paid $300+ for hair extensions that lasted exactly 2 weeks because I just HAD to scrub my scalp. I also have paid the extra bucks for colored contacts.
Then, in my mid-20’s, girls that I knew started getting breast implants. I felt like I drew a line of some sort right around then. “Well, that’s too invasive for me. Elective surgery or needles are where I draw the line.” However, all three times I have had my right ta-ta cut open to remove cysts, I thought, if the doctor tells me I have breast cancer, I’ll just have them both cut off and get bigger ones. Oh, and not to mention – why is the tattoo & piercing needle okay for me but an esthetician’s needle, not-so-much?
So, I have been forced to examine my blurry lines. Why do I feel more accepting of some fake things and more “judgy” of others? I realize if anything makes anyone feel more attractive & confident, it serves a purpose. Then I discovered what was really irking me: Why do any of us feel we need any sort of enhancement to feel more attractive?
When I look around at the humans I see on a regular basis, I see many women paying for at least some of the following: hair removal through waxing, threading, lasering, derma-plaining or bleaching, hair color or extensions, breast & ass implants, facial injections, lip fillers, nail extensions, eyebrow tinting or tatoos, etc. Oh, and don’t even get me started on high heels.
When I look around at the male counterparts in the same circle…literally none of those things are having money spent on them. No penis enhancements are being discussed or age spots being razored off. No ridiculously uncomfortable shoes are being purchased to make legs & tooshies look better. And having said that, I emphatically do not want our men to be more feminine. I simply wish women could feel pretty in our own skin with simple maintenance and none of the extras.
Coming back to the topic at hand, I realize letting go of lash extensions doesn’t have to be as deep as the constantly doctrinated lesser-than feelings dished out to women in advertising and otherwise. However, when reading lash serum reviews, a lady was so depressed without fake lashes that she hated looking in the mirror. I not only get that, it also makes me sad. My decision to finally go bare after a 5-year addiction is mostly about my path towards healthy and natural. I think your body forces you on this path as you approach 50, by the way. (In other words, I didn’t hit the brakes on drinking because wine and palomas started tasting bad.)
If I’m honest with myself, with constant lash extensions, my lower lids sometimes looked swollen, my eyes sometimes looked droopy and, with my line of work, which includes lots-o-sanding, my eyes often itched. Furthermore, the time and money spent on the appointments were quickly becoming like my nail addiction and getting me no closer to my desired move South. I take vitamins, work out and avoid Botox; It honestly seems silly to just turn around and pay for a toxic chemical to be placed directly adjacent to what allows my vision. I will still not grow old gracefully when my white hairs show up on my temples precisely 5 weeks after my last color touch-up. You may still see me carrying around my heels one night because I started out looking put-together (for me) and then remembered that I decided long ago I’d rather feel good than look cute. So, this is about what resonates with me and where I’m at on my path of progress. I sincerely don’t have the time or energy to worry about anyone else’s path, though I do try to throw some positive energy along my children’s paths. Maybe in another 10 years, I will have moved along to Justine Bateman’s grace on the subject of aging.
Since I have decided It Was Time, I have tried a few more natural and less expensive lash attempts to get me past the hump. My son found my magnetic lashes on the staircase at some point when I thought they were still attached to my face, so those are a no-go. I tried GrandeLASH Serum to help along my little buds of eyelashes that are finally free to flourish again. My eyes burned during application – a basic direct opposition to my natural and healthy path. Knowing the Earth provides what is needed, I am now on a strict Castor Oil only regimen for my lashes. I am currently on Day 4 in my journey. Research says it takes 2-3 full months to get lashes back to square one. If you see me sometime before Halloween and my lashes are somewhat askew, please congratulate me for holding strong. And, if they look full and perfectly aligned, please forgive me for my lack of discipline and help me get back on track. Maybe remind me of my rant up there in paragraphs 7-9. For now, I’m rockin’ this natural look the best I can, knowing that a peaceful, happy inner spirit creates a beauty that cannot be created by an artificial concoction.