Waffle Heads & Spaghetti

My not-yet-30, intelligent, beautiful niece has figured out how to make money by managing companies from her laptop while traveling around the world. She once told me she has seen women run circles around men in every aspect of business except one. With that (and the fact that she has the life I dream about) she had my interest piqued. When I asked what that one thing could be, her reply was simple: having the confidence in knowing that they can do so.

I’m not a man-hater. In fact, I love men too much. I’m fully happy without one, have struck out more than a few times with the species, but still seem to think life would be more fun with one joining along in my adventures. I only man-bash the certain few who have negatively affected me personally. Sometimes, when I’m feeling all Moon-Beamish, I can even see the blessings and lessons in those certain few (albeit, not after tequila). With that being said, I’m now going to point out a general difference that I have seen between men and women. I know full well that there are exceptions to the norm and there’s beauty in diversity, yadda yadda.

In my opinion (that was for anyone still needing the PC version of this post), men seem to approach obstacles with a bravado that convinces others, and most importantly- themselves, that they will be successful in the endeavor. Fake it ’til you make it seems to be their motto; ‘ignorance is bliss’ truly works out to their benefit in these instances. Women – or at least me and all of the chicas I have chatted with over the course of a lifetime – think, question themselves, ponder, worry and then think some more about everything and then some. Can I even do this? I don’t have a degree or experience in this field. Will it take too much time away from my family? Should I grow out my bangs? Did I put the clothes in the dryer? I should set my alarm for 10 minutes earlier just in case the weather is bad in the morning. What did the HR lady mean when she said that? I have to pee….

There actually are some scientific findings that back up this generality in a book my friend and I read years ago that made us start endearingly calling men “Waffle Heads.” In the book, Men Are Like Waffles, Women Are Like Spaghetti, Bill & Pam Farrel explain this scenario way better than I could attempt to here. Simply put, women’s minds are wired to multi-task and interconnect many thoughts while men’s brains focus on one “box” at a time. I remember nodding my head in agreement when the book explained a common example of when a man arrives home from work and isn’t eagerly ready to hear about his lady’s day. He requires some transition time to come out of that work box to enter the family one. Of course this doesn’t mean one way is bad or wrong or better, just that men and women are proven to be different beyond our genitalia.

In my 1st What Not to Do post, I touched on the belief that our words and thoughts send out energy that directly affects what we attract back to us. This is why the blind confidence works out in men’s favor (for an example, see current president). No matter what anyone on the outside believes about our abilities, our own thought about what we are capable of is the ultimate determining factor in success. Faith in ourselves, even if unwarranted, is a powerful force.

I admit to being an absolute Spaghetti Head. Pictured here are my beginning notes for this blog post. My thoughts are obviously all over the place; I can’t write or think in a linear fashion to save my life. And, I don’t care. I love being emotional, whimsical, hormonal and all over the place. (Who wants balls constantly hanging between their legs anyhow? ew!) What I do care about, though, is being FAF, or for you non-PC folks, Focused As Fuck. I tame the spaghetti for about 15 minutes a morning through meditation and then let my brain work its female magic all day long. I’m committed to spending the next 60+ years of my life emulating a strong, confident woman so that when my daughter is chatting with her kick-ass aunt in the future, she will be able to say, “You know what? Women run circles around men in every aspect of business…and basically life.” Game on, Waffle Heads.